No matter how far we've come it alwasy seems we end up where we began. And so I am here again typing in the same blog I started 3 1/2 yrs ago. With the same problems. It seems like as much as things change they stay the same. Will I ever be who I want to be? Will I ever be who God wants me to be? I am not humble, I am not chaste, I am not kind, I am not faithful, I am not holy, I am not trusting, I am not loving, and I am not complete in anyway, but over all I am not hopeful. A desparing statment I know. I want to be these things and I've tried hard at times to be them. Sometimes I've even been close to some of them, but I'll never reach them. I can not reach the heights I aspire to. I find that just because I've felt like I've been moving forward all this time it doesn't necessarily mean I have been. And so I'm broken, desparing, and a sinner. God do something drastic. What ever it takes for me to be yours.