Wow I said this blog wouldn't turn into a complaint sharing tool, or a journal but look it has. Anyway my word for the day is "drained". I had 2 classes and a test today then finished the first part of my project with my group in enginering, and finally went to lift. Yeah this lift really killed me I was so tired before I even started it. I think I need to drink more water. Any way peace to my boy Nate who I saw like 20 times today. Plus props to him for doing Freeway, oddly enough his talking to me and one of my friends sparked an intresting conversation. Yeah I love it when I run into ppl I know makes me feel like I know ppl. Yeah I know that was really redundent. Ready set go!!!! Dunno just felt like typing that for some reason. And Hey Dad, I love you!!! <---cause I found out he reads my blog.

It is so great to wake up in the morning and having no hot water. and of course you don't know that till you turn it on. I am so glad I took a shower last night right before it went out. However, I am still used to waking up and taking a hot shower. Well then now we get to why it went out, Does Anyone Know? Can we blame that on Slocum, or maybe just little brow field mice. Maybe its a terrorist attack against me. I am a good target for international mischeif aren't I?

Even when I am thourghly confused about everything that exists, including spelling, I can alwasy go to the rec and lift weights and feel better. I have a Physics test tomarrow I need to study for when I get back and I need to do really well on it. The problem is I know everything I need to know then I forget it when I try to think about it. Wow that makes sense doesn't it. Lets put it this way, I know what everything is about then I start to take the test and forget it all. Very common problem I would say. Anyway I think I will be able to focus better when I get back. I have a practice test I can work when I get back, and I think I just need to read over a three dimesional circle of charge acting in a direction.

I have a feeling that talking to ppl is the easiest thing in the world once you learn how, the trick is to know who to talk to. You find the right ppl to talk to you can learn anything and do anything. But the most important thing by FAR in my opinion is to be honest with yourself, you lie to yourself and there is no one you can tell the truth to. Once you start you can't stop, its like a virus infection in your thoughts and in your mind. How do you cure it? You must drive the Devil out! You must use a vaccine to burn it from your body, or you will live life sick. I don't want to be sick, and the sad part is sometimes you don't know you're sick until it is too late. I was sick with anger, sick with malice, sick with lust, sick with this lack of feeling inside me. I say was but it still lingers and without weekly treatment, dayily treatment, it threatens to consume me alwasy and again. What makes it difficult to just take the drug and be better is sometimes you forget you are sick, and don't take it. LORD GOD please help me with rememberance and to not forget that when ever I fall backwards you will catch me, if I only ask with faith in that you will catch me. LORD JESUS I am sorry for all the sins I have placed on you, that you would have to do what you did for me. And when I forget to be sorry let me know how far I yet have to go.

Tick tock went the clock... I can't ever seem to go to sleep on time even when I really have nothing to do but go to sleep. I am too distracted to study, and too awake to sleep. I think I am going to watch a movie. Or maybe I can trick myself into sleeping? Can that be done, isn't that called hypnosis? Well then since it has already been invented I will have to use something else cause thats harder and takes more effort and might make me sleep through the strain it puts on my mind. I wish there was a political debate on those alwasy put me to sleep. What is going on with me. It is not insomnia I could easily go to sleep if I wanted to but I really don't want to. Got any suggestions? *my other self answers* It is not good to talk to yourself Craig it is a sign of mental instability. On well I am done with retorical questions for the night. Or am I? ahahhhahhaha I crack myself up... Well then I need to figure out so many things I don't know how to start. Heck I don't even know what the questions are I just know they need to be asked so I can know about them... Night Me,. Myself, and I :P

I can't put my finger on it. Something is knawing at me like there is something I need to do, or have left undone. Almost like there is something I need to see and it is in the corner of my eye but everytime I turn to look I can't see it. I know... it sounds really wierd. Stasis, that is my word for the week. And according to Jesko my new focus should be Mathew 5:8 and I think he is right. I need how to learn how to do things for ppl without expecting anything in return, not even thanks. But what is bothering me the most is that out of all the ppl I know and that I consider my friends how many of them do I really know personally. Like beyond the surface. As I stated in a previous blog entry I am really bad at reading ppl. And talking is not one of my strong points when it comes to anything beyond getting a laugh. I may be a anomoly in the social order. A branch apart. ALl the ppl I know seem to know ppl who are close to them and all about them. Wow I really need to pray. Got to go to bed now so I can go to church tomarrow morning night to anyone who actually reads my blog, which I think probably equals three ppl, me, myself, and I. Which is really the point of it all anyway right? Cause no one really wants to look at your whining and complaining and your inability to spell =P.