I ran acrossed an old post from Febuary 25, 2003.... yeah a long time ago... I am reposting it cause it reminded me of some stuff:

What does it mean to be an under achiever... one word Craig. I think there is a problem with my out look and the physical world. I seem to be satisfied with not really being anyone big. I don't want fame, I don't want fortune, just enough money to live comfortably. I want a wife who loves me and maybe some children. I don't knoe when I want this. I don't know if it'll happen. But I am nobody special. I am no more than what it feels good to be. I am learning to be more by being less. I don't standout in a crowd, or in a conversation. I have few aquaintences and fewer friends. The ppl who do care about me don't really know me, heck I don't even know myself. The more I think about it and feel about it the more I begin to see there is only one person to rely on. And if you have read any of my blogs I am sure you can guess who. Yep thats right Jesus. To him I don't have to standout be different or conform, I can be the best or the worst and he still knows me and loves me, even when I betray him or turn away or even if I were to spit at him. Which of course I don't want to. I have found the drive I need to live a life of meaning. Not for myself but to please him. I know not how or when, all I know is that when I feel how much he loves me I am more joyful then I have the right to be. Suffering is good that it brings me closer to him. If that is what it takes give it all to me. Load it on my back like a pack mule and whip me into submission. I desire to feel emotion rather than laugh when I hear about the grief of others. Wow that not what I set out to write on my blog today, but it feels good to express my emotions.

BRING IT ON and teach me to be humble in taking it on,
craig


So that was interesting!

Peace,
Craig

Sometimes its hard to just let go and let God. But I'm doing my best. Hope anyone who reads this has a good day! But I need to go to class, I felt I should write in this before I go for some reason though.

Peace,
Craig